Quote Of The Day

Since we will be heading out tomorrow morning and are finalizing the remainder of things here in Dayton (shutting down Internet) I am sending the Funny Friday Quote early.  After today, we will no longer have access to it until we get Internet access in Dallas.  We are so excited to announce that our Pastor will be ordaining Jeff this coming August and thus answering another prayer.  As we begin to see and continue to follow the path that God is placing before us, we can’t wait to start the church in San Antonio, Texas.  We will be a sister church to our current church and look forward to all that God is going to be doing throughout this nation.   We will also be launching Sword Ministries via the internet where it and Quote of the day will fall under our church to become a part of a bigger ministry.    Jeff and I will continue to pray for you all and can’t wait to share more adventures with you.

In Christ’s Love,

Christy

Funny Friday Quote:  What’s wrong with my wife?

     “A doctor came into a hospital room and told the patient’s husband to wait outside while he examined his wife.  A few minutes later the doctor came out and asked a nurse’s aide if she could get him a pair of pliers.  She did, and he went back into the patient’s room.  Five minutes later he came out and asked for a hammer, the anxious husband demanded to know what was wrong with his wife.  “I don’t know yet,” the doctor said.  “I can’t get my bag open.” (Executive Speechwriter Newsletter)

Bible verse of the day:  Mark 6:31

“And He said to them, “Come aside by yourselves to a deserted place and rest while.”  For there were many coming and going, and they did not eve have time to eat.”

Prayer:

Dear Heavenly Father,

Today ends another week and begins another weekend.  Father, as we head out today, I pray that You continue to guide us for Your Will and show us the things that we need to know for today.  Give us peace as we head into a new area, a new adventure waiting, and new people that we get to meet.  Father, I pray for individuals that don’t know You as their Lord and Savior.  Continue to speak into their hearts and may they hear that ever so gentle voice calling them.  I thank You for this day!

In Jesus Name I pray,

Amen

Funny Friday Quote (Happy 4th!!):  Medical Terms Defined

Benign:  What you be after you be eight.

Artery:  The study of paintings.

Bacteria:  Back door to cafeteria.

Barium:  WHat doctors do when patients die.

Caesarean section:  A neighborhood in Rome.

G . I. Series:  World Series of military baseball.

Hangnail:  What you hang your coat on.

Labor pain:  Getting hurt at work.

Medical staff:  A doctor’s cane.

Nitrates:  Cheaper than day rates.

Recovery Room:  Place to do upholstery.

Tablet:  A small table.

Terminal illness:  Getting sick at the airport.

Tumor:  More than one.

Urine:  Opposite of you’re out.

Bible verse of the day:  Charles Stanley

“Attitude and the spirit in which we communicate are as important as the words we say.”

Prayer:

Heavenly Father,

It is so important that when I speak to choose my words carefully so that I might be a hope and an encouragement to those around me.  Father, let my soul live, according to Your Will, that I shall praise You all the days of my life.  I pray for a safe weekend, and for safe travel for my parents that are flying in from Dallas.  Continue to give us rest through this move and may we continue on this road that You have set before us.  I thank You for this day!

In Jesus Name I pray,

Amen

Funny Friday Quote:  Ron Dentinger

“These are tough times.  But I’m not the only one with problems.  My bank returned a sixty-five dollar check marked “INSUFFICIENT FUNDS.”  I can’t believe they don’t have sixty-five dollars.”

Bible verse of the day:  Psalm 40:3

“He has put a new song in my mouth—Praise to our God; Many will see it and fear, and will trust in the LORD.”

Prayer:

Dear Heavenly Father,

I will continue to sing songs of praise to You everyday of my life.  Father as the move draws near and the things around me seem to be out of order, I will trust in You to give me the peace that I need to get through it.  As I look to You as my Ultimate source of strength, I will walk daily in knowing that You will be there to comfort and guide me in this new endeavour.  As I look to today with excitement, gearing up for all the adventures that the day may hold, I pray that You will use me to share Your wonderful News with others, that they may come to know You as their Lord and Savior, and have a personal relationship with You.  I thank You for this day!

In Jesus Name I pray,

Amen 

Funny Friday Quote:  Toni Sortor

   “Long, long ago an old Indian chief was about to die, so he called for Geronimo and Falling Rocks, the two bravest warriors in his tribe.  The chief instructed each to go out and collect buffalo skins.  Whoever returned with the most skins would be the new chief.

   About a month later, Geronimo came back with one hundred pelts, but Falling Rocks never returned.  Even today as you drive through the West you can see signs saying:  Watch out for Falling Rocks.”

Bible verse of the day:  John 14:27

“Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you.  Let not your heart be troubled neither let it be afraid.”

Prayer:

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank You for the peace that You give to me.  It is the peace that helps me stay focused and my heart to not become troubled.  Father, I trust in You as You continue to show me Your ways and teach me Your paths.  Continue to lead me in Your truth that I may live a life that is pleasing to You.  Father, my heart goes out to those that don’t know You as their Lord and Savior.  May lives continue to be changed and souls saved. I thank You for this day!

In Jesus Name I pray,

Amen 

Funny Friday Quote:  The Pearly Gates

   Three aged men arrive at the Pearly Gates at the same time.  As part of their orientation to Heaven, St. Peter asks what kind of remarks they would most like to hear from their family and friends at their funerals.

   “I would like to hear them say I was a great doctor and a good family man,” said the first.

   “I would like to hear themm say I was a wonderful husband and that, during my career as a schoolteacher, I made a difference in many lives,” chimed in the second fellow.

  ”Those both sound terrific,” replied the third, “but I’d like to hear them say, ‘look!  He’s moving!’”

Bible verse of the day:  Psalm 62:7

“In God is my salvation and my glory; the rock of my strength, and my refuge, is in God.”

Prayer:

Dear Heavenly Father,

I pray to know the love of Christ which passes all understanding and to be filled with all the fullness that comes from knowing You.  It is a true blessing when I hear your voice no matter what the circumstances are in my life.  I pray that You continue to show me and teach me how to hear Your voice so that no matter what distractions may come my way, I am able to hear it and to follow all that You have planned for me.  I thank You for this day!

In Jesus Name I pray,

Amen

Funny Friday Quote: Music saved my life 

Little Noah came into the house with a new harmonica. “Grandpa, do you mind if I play this in here?”

“Of course not, Noah. I love music. In fact, when your grandma and I were young, music saved my life.”
“What happened?” “Well, it was during the famous Johnstown flood. The dam broke and when the water hit out house it knocked it right off the foundation. Grandma got on the dining room table and floated out safely.”
“How about you?”
“Me? I accompanied her on the piano!”

Bible verse of the day:  Psalm 33:3

“Sing to Him a new song; play skillfully with a shout of joy.”

Prayer:

Dear Heavenly Father,

I rejoice in You oh Lord.  May the words that I speak and the life that I live be a sweet sound made to Your ears.  Father, I will praise You all the days of my life.  I pray for safe travel tonight as we head to Dallas.  I pray for Kim as she writes this week.  Thank You for giving her a servants heart to do what You have asked of her.  I pray for lives to be changed and souls to be saved.  I pray that You light a spark in each of us that we may not rest the same again.  I thank You for this day!

In Jesus Name I pray,

Amen 

Funny Friday Quote:  Observational Humor

• Why doesn’t glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
• If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
• When it rains, why don’t sheep shrink?
• Should vegetarians eat animal crackers?
• Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift?
• What do you do when you see an endangered animal that eats only endangered plants?
• If the cops arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
• Instead of talking to your plants, if you yelled at them would they still grow?  Only to be troubled and insecure?

Bible verse of the day:  Psalm 100:5

“For the Lord is good; His mercy is everlasting, and His truth endures to all generations.”

Prayer:

Dear Heavenly Father,

I give thanks and praise to You for You are worthy to be praised!  Thank You for such a blessed day!  May I continue through this day with joy in my heart and singing on my lips.  Continue to lead me in this path that You have placed before me protecting and guiding me that I may be a testimony to others. 

In Jesus Name I pray,

Amen 

Funny Friday Quote:  Two Eskimos

“Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, but when they lit a fire in the craft it sank, proving once and for all that you can’t have your kayak and heat it, too.”

Bible verse of the day:  Proverbs 8:17

“I love those who love me, and those who seek me diligently will find me.”

Prayer:

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank You for Your Word today.  May Your Words, be a constant guide in my life and a reminder of how great You are.  Father, I thank You for my life and every detail that You have included in it. You know all my ways and  because You love me so much, I am blessed for having shared every detail with You about my life.  I thank You for this day!

In Jesus Name I pray,

Amen

Funny Friday Quote:  Gone to sea

“Just as the preacher was about to enter the pulpit, a woman in the congregation handed him a note about her husband.  It read:  “Bill Adams having gone to sea, his wife desires the congregation’s prayers for his safety.”  The preacher, pressed for time, read the note too hastily, telling the congregation, “Bill Adams, having gone to see his wife, desires the prayers of the congregation for his safety.”

Bible verse of the day:  Psalm 71:3

“Be my strong refuge, to which I may resort continually; You have given the commandment to save me, for You are my rock and my fortress.”

Prayer:

Dear Heavenly Father,

I just can’t believe how quickly time is flying by!  With so much to do and such little time before our big move, I just pray that You bring things in order, starting with our minds, spirit, and body.  May we find rest in You this day and continue to look forward with the plans that You have set before us.  I thank You for all that You have done in my life and I pray that You continue to change lives and that souls will be saved.  I thank You for this day!

In Jesus Name  I pray,

Amen

Funny Friday Quote:  Jeff Rovin

   “The doctor decided to put his patient on a diet.   “I want you to eat regularly for two days,”  the physician directed.   “Then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for two more weeks.  The next time I see you, you should have lost at least five pounds.”

   When the man returned, he had lost twenty pounds.  “You did this just by following my instructions?”  the doctor asked.

   The fellow nodded.  “I’ll tell you, though, I thought I was going to drop dead that third day.”

   “From hunger?”

   “No, from skipping!”

Bible verse of the day:  Psalm 8:1

“O LORD, our Lord, How excellent is Your name in all the earth, Who have set Your glory above the heavens!”

Prayer:

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank You for such an awesome day!  Today as I venture out into what Your day holds for me, I pray that You show me Your ways and lead me in Your truth.  Examine me Father that I may  walk in integrity.  Lord, I wish to only seek and serve You the rest of my days here on this earth.  I love You Father and I pray for a weekend of continued service and worship to You in the hopes that lives may be changed.  Father, those that don’t know You and don’t have a personal relationship with You, may You stir in them the love that You have so blessed me with that their only desire will be to seek You out.

In Jesus Name I pray,

Amen